Suburban Island

Baby Steps

Like all working women with college-age kids under her roof and a husband who embraces stress with a vengance, I often have my work cut out for me. I want to be one of those organized women with a lovely orderly home, a daily exercise routine, a weekly menu of healthy meals, a set bedtime that provides me eight hours sleep, bills paid on time, laundry all done, and every creative effort addressed. I want a peaceful home, a serene respite for the whole family from the demands of the world, an island of serenity in the middle of 21st century suburbia.

Do you think I have that? Just in case you are unsure the answer is... Uh, no.

Do you think I am being a bit unrealistic? Of course.

I think so too but then sometimes I grow concerned that I am one of those people who just isn't getting it right and that everyone else is doing better than me at creating a clean, non-chaotic, charming home. It is not that I want to morph into June Cleaver and wear pearls and a shirt-dress while I vacuum and dust - although that is impressive. I just want to feel like I have things together enough that when I walk in the house I sigh with relief for being home instead of sigh with frustration at how much there is to do and how I will never be able to get it all done.

The thing is that I have a nice home. It is not the most orderly home in the world but it is not a case for the health department either. There's a lot to like about it but I just want to make it better - more pulled together with the goal of being a more enjoyable and pleasant home for all. I don't think I am alone in this desire. And all those others things - enough sleep, healthy meals, daily exercise, enough time for my creative projects, and the rest of it - we all need that. Like everyone else, I'm working on it. I think I am making some progress too.

I have been getting the digest emails from flylady.com. I refuse to wear my shoes in the house as she suggests but I love her suggestions for taking on tasks in 15 minute intervals. It has been working for me.

I am using this 15 minute approach to attack problem spots in my home (there are plenty of them too) - piles of papers, tables tops, the front entryway, etc. and it has been helping. It's going to take a while for it to transform my whole household but there are a few places around my house that we are seeing free and clear of clutter for the first time in quite a while. It's a small victory but it is a victory nevertheless.

In the meantime, I open up my work laptop and see the list of things I need to fit in this weekend. I was sure I would have time to do all these things and maybe more. There are 12 items on this list - TWELVE. And you might well ask - Have you done them? And I would have to answer - Well, not exactly. You might be drawn to further inquire if you are the hopeful type - Any of them? And I would have to burst your positive perception of Suburban Island living by responding - Well, not exactly.

Guess what I'm doing tonight.

Bad Boots and Good Chocolate

I am finally starting to feel better. I have been getting a little more sleep and the cough is almost gone. I wish it would just totally disappear because every time I do cough my chest and side hurt like crazy. I think I must have pulled something with a week and a half of steady coughing to my credit.

One of the things that always happens to me as I start feeling better after being sick is that I want to get things back in order again. All last week, I slowly caught up on the stacks of laundry, did some serious grocery shopping (the way only moms can grocery shop), paid some bills, and geared up on the work side of things. Because I am home based and don't have to go downtown to our business center or to client sites every day, I was able to nurse myself a little bit by staying warm and dry at home. Except for Thursday. Thursday I had to go downtown for a client appointment. The client is wonderful but getting there was hell.

It was really windy and cold on Thursday morning and there was not a taxi to be found. I stood in the cold for what felt like forever before finally getting lucky. It turns out there was taxi strike. No wonder I was freezing my ass off. The client meeting was great and afterwards I did some extra work for them that required me to stand in these boots I have that I only wore because I figured they would keep my feet toasty warm. As I worked, my feet started to ache. By the time I walked out of the building and up the street, I was limping and a spasm was inching its way up my one leg. On top of it, I realized that my respiratory problems were still hanging on as I dragged my purse and heavy laptop bag up the hill internally crying, "ouch, ouch, ouch," with every step.

Because there were no cabs cruising the streets for fares, I went to Union Station. There would definitely be cabs there or I could take the subway if push came to shove. I had made a decision to go to a shoe store that I knew was at the station and cast off these cruel boots at any price. I spotted some comfy looking shoes on sale, tried them on, paid for them, and wore them out of the store with a sigh of relief. Problem solved. Okay, I did have another bag now but at least I could walk again without inwardly screaming.

Then another miraculous turn of events occurred. There was an upscale chocolate store right across from the shoe store. These chocolates are fantastic and hard to find. Since Thursday was Valentine’s Day, I was thinking how in the world I was going to get my hands on these particular chocolates for my daughter, who loves them. Perfect. And it was nothing to stand in line with my new shoes. Soon enough, I had chocolates for everyone in the house.

On Thursday, I got drug store chocolates, which were actually pretty good. But the rest of the house got the top shelf chocolates. Because I knew I was going to get some flowers and a big red heart-shaped box of candy from the drug store, I have to admit that I bought myself a little bag of the fancy chocolates too. Wicked me.

A Long Week Comes to an End

I have been off of work for most of the week due to a severe asthma flair brought on by a bad respiratory infection. I was glad to be home on the sofa in my jammies under a bunch of blankets with a heating pad on my chest swigging hot tea. Even though I wasn't supposed to work, I did work - quietly, in little spurts on my laptop. It was a relief really because I had so much to do that I would have just been worried about the pile up of tasks that I was falling behind on. In fact, I got a few really important things done and it did take some of the work pressure off. And I did remind myself that it is okay to rest and I tried to do that. I am on so many meds this week that it is hard to sleep. Last night, I was up until 6:30 in the morning with mind racing. I felt pretty crappy the whole day even though I did finally get about 5 hours sleep.

This is the second serious respiratory infection/severe asthma flair that I have had this winter. Bad luck. I also think I need to take better care of myself. I am working really hard. There are other demands in life beyond work as well - family, home, friends, community, and chores of all sorts. The art of juggling all the responsibilities of life often fails me and I just start tossing some of the balls that I ought to be juggled aside. Those balls that tend to get tossed aside first are the things that are truly most beneficial to me - like healthy diet, rest, exercise, etc. I had lost some weight last year and I felt great but I am almost back at square one again. I've been eating out a lot and traveling a ton. That's not a recipe for light eating. And yes, I do like a glass of wine at night and a proper fancy-ass coffee drink during the day. I know that is not calorie free but it is a treat and we all need a few little treats in life. Being sick over the last week, I have missed both of these treats. I wonder if it will have any impact on the scale? I feel certain I have filled the void with rice pudding, mac and cheese, and pot pies (my easy meals while I wasn't feeling well). I was walking every evening this past spring and summer but when the weather got cold, my desire to walk about in the great suburban outdoors failed me. I have a gym membership but it is such a pain to get dressed up in the sweats that I can never seem to find when I need them and go work out after a long day. Frankly, I am pretty worn out by the end of the day and conversely, I will never be a morning person so morning workout programs are beyond my ability.

Since the end of summer, it has just been one thing and another and I find I have a hard time dieting, exercising, getting enough sleep, drinking enough water, taking my vitamins, and all the rest of it. A lot of it is the big demands of work - I totally love my job but it is very hectic. Having two college kids at home makes for a busy life as well. I know I kind of thrive on all the busy-ness and the slightly chaotic element that a lively household brings. I just run and run like that bunny with the batteries in its back. I also know that I should probably work on balancing things a bit.

How do you do that again?

Sick Day(s) and a Dose of Spritopias

I have all these things I need to do, and want to do, but haven't done. Including writing here. It's been one thing after another on Suburban Island.

I came back from the cruise, which was phenomenal, and flew out to the annual meeting for work the next day. These work meeting are intense learning experiences and you are with your co-workers from the time you wake up until you drop off to sleep - exhausted. All through the meeting, I promised myself that I would come back and write more about my adventures on the high seas but I started feeling a little ill on my last day in Tuscon and by Friday night I was full out sick with a nasty respiratory virus. I rarely get so sick that I just stop everything and sit on the sofa or go up to bed but that is what I did. I had a sore throat, fever, cough, and that icky achy feeling. Because I have asthma, I know that there is more to come because my asthma is going to flair and even with meds I am wheezing and I know my breathing is way off. And maybe because of the wacky breathing, or the coughing, or the generally virus symptoms, my head just felt like it was spinning a little. I did get some medicine but by this morning I was still feeling really bad. I went to see my doctor and I am a mess. He told me to stop working for a few days - a hard order for me to follow but I will because he is right - and get some rest. He switched up my meds so I should be on the mend.

Enough about my sad state.

I had a wonderful opportunity while I was in Tucson to see one of my favorite bloggers and very cool person - Christopher aka Spritopias of Caustically Optimistic. He drove a couple hours to take me to lunch before my work conference started and I was so delighted to see him. Of course, you know we had to have an adventure - and we did. I call it the adventure of the lost restaurant.

Ironically, we couldn't find a restaurant to have our lunch at and the places the hotel recommended were all closed. Everything in town seemed to be closed on Sunday afternoon. We drove - or rather Christopher drove and I commented on the the interesting aspects of the local architecture. Christopher managed to park without incident in a parallel parking space down the street from some promising looking eateries but after dashing through the rain we discovered they were closed. Yes, everything was closed. Sadly, after power-parking, we had to shove of again in search for what we were beginning to despair of every finding - a restaurant with an OPEN sign in the window that didn't just serve beer and bar snacks. We were starving.

We drove down the restaurant-less streets as in some newly discovered Twilight Zone episode.

I have to tell you - I was getting worried. I think Christopher was too but he was soldiering on and because of his determination to prove that we were not in said Twilight Zone episode, he did spot a great restaurant where we dined on the most delicious sampler platter of quesadillas that I have ever had. Ditto on the tamales - corn, beef, and chicken. I was in heaven.

It was great fun seeing Christopher. And the lunch was his treat! Now that's a real pal.