The weather here is deceptively spring-like. This encourages even the wisest of us to tool around in flip-flops and short-sleeved shirts and then wonder why, when the cold weather kicks back in again, we seem to have caught a sudden cold. I did not succumb to flip-flops but only because I have not had time to indulge in a pedicure of late and dislike chipped polish when not shoved into socks and boots. And yes, I do wear clean underwear just in case that Mack truck strikes me down so at least I have something going for me in that worst case scenario – at least, unless they yank off my boots and then I’m hammered. Since I still don’t have time to run up and get my nails done, I am really on the lookout for bad drivers and acts of God.
Recently I was in L.A. and the weather there was like heaven – at least for a few of the days I was there. My manicure was perfect then so all was going my way. I’m an east coast girl and L.A. seems exotic to me. I was there for work and was pretty excited because I won a big award in our company at our annual meeting. I got to go up on stage and receive it in a parade of other award winners. It was a big deal and I was so overwhelmed that when they handed me the big glass trophy, although I noticed that there was no name on it and it was so heavy with fingerprints that a CSI team would have had a field day with it, I still clutched onto it for dear life. I have never received a real trophy before. I was the kid who got picked last in those dire gym classes which I attended with the dread that only the totally non-athletic can appreciate. So this was my moment and I was going with it.
They held me fast between two managers for the requisite photo, the magical trophy was heavy and solid in my grasp, and then I traveled down a line of execs; I was shaking hands and smiling like a deranged person who might turn dangerous given the least provocation. And all the time, that trophy was clasped reverently against my swelling bosom. I was proud - damn proud. I had actually worked my ass off over the last year and I was glad that it had been so noted. This was my moment in the sun. Luckily there was no microphone so I was saved from saying something really stupid like – You like me. You really like me.
As it was, I floated back through the sea of tables and clapping colleagues and sat back down at my table all flushed with the glory of the moment. Certainly, I had worked my butt off for this moment in the limelight but the moment could not last forever. Here's where the trophy came in. Even as the glow would subside, I would have my impressive glass trophy – a shining reminder of how, for a moment in time, I was cool – very cool. I was thinking about the trophy without the name and the fingerprints when somebody came to my table and bending down said very softly – as one might somebody who seems to have forgotten to take their medication or a child grasping an overpriced toy in a store that they seem loath to relinquish without a fight – We meant to take that from you. You’ll get the real one in the mail.
It seemed my moment in the sun was already done. She walked away with my battleworn trophy and my only hope was that the corporate photographer had not followed her back for a crazy candid shot. I’m checking my mailbox everyday though - for both the trophy and the picture.
Who doesn’t like blue? It’s the color of the sky on a summer’s day. It’s the color of a perfect little nest of robin’s eggs in the spring. It’s the color of the ocean in a lovely daydream. It’s the color of a little Tiffany’s box on particularly fortunate days. It’s the color of…
Here’s something I didn’t notice before.
It seems that blue is also the color of the toilet that my neighbor has decided to rip out of one of their bathrooms and lay half in and half out of a big black garbage bag and place along the side of their house that faces ours. This is not a pretty picture. Not at all.
I guess that blue is also the color of a common toilet bowl. Toilet bowl blue resting placidly in a suburban green yard. That just stinks.
Don’t you just love neighbors?
No matter. I got on a plane to Atlanta for business this week. Up into the big blue sky and back down again. Things would get better with the color blue once in Atlanta.
I will not let the blue toilet that is almost in my yard ruin my love of blue. No, not I. I still like the color blue. I do. I like it very much. Even if there is a big blue toilet suddenly perched right on the edge of my Suburban Island like a misplaced half bath.
Transplanted for a few days to the great city of Atlanta, I decided to give blue another chance. I went to the Atlanta office in one of my best suits – Tiffany blue - and I wore the prettiest blue and cream spectator pumps you have probably every seen. I know you would tell me so if you saw them. I am sure you would say that I was a vision in blue if only you spied me walking around Atlanta trying to find a Starbucks or Caribou. I was feeling pretty good about myself and the color blue (after I found my coffee). I knew blue wouldn’t let me down in the end. That toilet bowl thing was just a fluke.
Upon arriving at the office, a colleague eyed me up and down in my blue suit and gleefully told me she had one just like it. Imagine that. She said – Yes, I think it’s the exact same suit.
I had a feeling that this conversation was going to go downhill fast. I am already getting annoyed and she has barely even begun to embellish her saga of the same suit. Let me tell you that this is a woman that has quite different taste in attire than I and just about everything else in life as well. I find it improbable that she has the exact same suit but I would be willing to accept her thesis if only she would stop talking about the blue suits. Yet, she goes on.
Yes, I’m really sure I have that suit. I got it on sale. I got it for $45 on sale. Yeah, $45 on sale.
Don’t you just love co-workers?
I assured her that I did not get my suit on sale for $45. She looked at me in my blue suit and said – oh, yeah, well the buttons are different on mine. Maybe it’s not the same.
You bet your damn buttons it’s not the same suit, babe. Blue didn't feel the same for the rest of the day.
Today, was another chance for the color blue to prevail. I am finally done with work and took a day off to hang around with my best pal who lives outside Atlanta. We decide to go to the new Aquarium. When we arrive, we park on the blue level - Level 3 – and we both note that the posts are painted Tiffany blue. Inside we see a glorious array of fish and plenty of blue water. It is true that a large Beluga Whale we were admiring did take a major dump in his perfect blue tank - talk about a big blue toilet - while were were just standing there minding our own business. Aside from that, however, so far, so good. We walk outside and the sky is bright blue and full of Atlanta sunshine. The color blue made it though the day without further incident.
Looks like three times is the charm. Blue is back in my good graces. I knew things were going to be okay again between me and the color blue.
And the toilet bowl? Well, I understand that it's still there but, on the bright side, at least it is a particularly lovely shade of blue.